The Thrill of the "Marathon"

When I was about 14 yrs old, I remember flipping the channels & totally stopping when I saw a small thin woman running her heart out. I was amazed at all the wonderful support she was getting from the crowd. All of a sudden, she was coming towards the finish line & she threw her arms up in the air & broke the tape! The cheers grew louder and I remember getting goosebumps and tears and saying, "I want to do that one day!" My mom looked at me like I had two heads & for the most part no one paid any attention to me. Besides, I was just 14yrs old & just watched Olga Markova win the Los Angeles Marathon (26.2 miles!) in 2:30.

I could not get that image out of my head & woke up the next morning to run on Queens Blvd at 5am so I could get to school on time. I was so excited! I went out that chilly morning and started to run & within a couple of blocks, got a severe stitch on my side, so I ended up walking back. Once I got back home, my whole face was burning up in sweat and that to me felt AWESOME! But,I knew right then that this was going to be crazy HARD! I was not going to give up and gave myself weekly goals to run 2 blocks farther than the week before. By the end of that year, I was practically running the whole Queens Boulevard from 48th Street to the Courthouse on 118th Street (about 7 miles!).

At 15yrs of age, I was living on my own, but never gave up on that goal! I joined the New York Road Runner's Club and started attending running classes & racing. Once I turned 16, I wrote a letter to the president of the organization at the time, Mr. Allan Steinfeld explaining my living/financial situation. He waived the entry fee & I was now all set to run my first ever NYC Marathon! I wanted to feel like that woman crossing the finish line even if at the moment had little to no support. I was doing this for me...

The day of the 26.2 mile foot race was here! I had my "red best friend" & it was ridiculously cold, but it was the day I had dreamed about for 2 years. Hearing that gun go off in Staten Island on the Verranzanno Bridge was electrifying! I felt wonderful up until mile 16 when we crossed the 59th Street Bridge..Coming off of the bridge into the amazing crowd on 1st Avenue kept me going until mile 20. I couldn't believe I had 6.2 miles left to go. My whole body ached and every step I took was painful, but I willed myself to that glorious finish line! Entering Central Park & hearing the cheers of the spectators & crossing that finish line was something I will never ever forget. If I could do this, I could do ANYTHING and during any time of challenges throughout my life, I just remember how I never gave up here or anywhere...

I went on to run 10 NYC Marathons, 2 Boston, 1 Chicago & 1 Steamtown Marathon..On Sunday, October 31, 2010, I will be running my 15th marathon at the Marine Corps Marathon. I am always so very grateful & thankful to my higher power for giving me the strength & that "never give up" attitude from a very young age.

It has always been my goal to help & inspire others as well, so after 15 weeks of training, my big sister Jackie & my wonderful manager & special friend, Johnny are all set to run Marine Corps as well. This marathon will totally ROCK!

Every marathon is special to me as I set new goals & I am reminded of how far I have come from the very first marathon 15 years ago!

"Each Marathon, Each fight is a direct reflection of how I deal with my everyday challenges!"



Much Love,

Patty Boom Boom
www.patriciaalcivar.com
"Face Your Fears, Live Your Dreams!"

My experience with a Bully!

We all experience challenges through life which teach us a valuable lesson, but at 32yrs of age and currently enrolled in a special EMT/Paramedic program, I did not expect to have a "Bully" who literally had me in tears for weeks!

Getting into this program was something I totally valued and was going to do my very best to excel. With education being so expensive and the economy being the way it is, I cannot imagine not being grateful and taking full advantage of this amazing opportunity. My enthusiasm definitely showed as I was consistently in school early, turned in all my assignments, participated in class and scored high on all my exams.

However, there was one guy in his mid 20's who received all the attention. He had a military background and had been in Afghanistan for a couple of years. He definitely had a-lot of potential and spoke intelligently when he wanted to. But, he was aggressive, loud & consistently disruptive in class which had me so perplexed when half of the class seemed fascinated with him. There were a few instances where the class was on a "study/reading" break and "the bully" took this chance to show highly inappropriate videos from his iPhone. I have never been a follower and was not about to start either..

My lack of participation in the Bully's discussions definitely prompted attention and one day as I was walking into the classroom he shouted "snobby bitch". I turned right around & walk up to him and said "Excuse Me" and he just started laughing. My heart was beating crazy fast and I felt myself shaking. I just wished that he was having a bad day and that he confused me with someone else. Unfortunately, things got much worse throughout the next few weeks. He changed his usual seat in the back of the classroom to sitting right next to me and made my days in school a nightmare!

This was going to be a true test of patience, resilience and faith for me. In my mind, this bully was intolerant of contrary opinion, domineering and a total coward, but kept questioning myself why I was one of the very few who can see this and why was he picking on me?

I did not let him intimidate me and the more he teased me, the harder I studied for my exams and did everything as perfectly as I could in hopes that I would make it to the next phase of the program and he didn't. I wanted to keep everything inside, but realized that one of the very important things in my life is the wonderful people I have surrounded myself with. I did open up about it and had awesome support & advice from my family, friends and a special teacher.

Getting through each day was an incredible task and I felt mentally & physically drained from all I was taking. Morning prayers, my daily exercise and appearing to be extra confident in class gave me hope that justice would be done.

The end of the first phase was quickly approaching, so the exams were getting tougher. The Bully would blatantly cheat with a few classmates and even showed pornography films from his iPhone while I had to listen to all of this. There were a few students who I knew did not agree with this crazy behavior and there was a rumor that a few had complained when the bully was pulled out to have a talk with the Director of the program.

The last week came and we had to absolutely pass the CPR practical & written exams with an 85% or higher. We would be judged on EVERYTHING which included: Assignments, Scores on all Exams, Attendance, Participation & Professionalism. It was emphasized to us that even if we were great students with high marks but lacked a professional attitude/work ethic, we would be dismissed from the program. I had so much faith that some of the teachers could see how horrible the bully was and allowing him to move on in this program would be a big mistake.

The last day had arrived...I had passed all my exams with flying colors, but so did the bully! The last day consisted of "Team Building" activities. We were broken up into 5 groups of six students. I had so much fun for the most part..One of the last games consisted of a relay race where 3 members had long splints bandaged to their feet (imagine 3 people being on long skis). My team had an awesome strategy and we marched in place to a good cadence and when they said "GO" we went! We won and it was awesome! 2nd round came and it was my turn to lead my team on the skis...The bully's team was right next to me. When they said "Go" the bully and his classmate came from behind & shoved me! I fell hard right on my tail bone and sprained my ankle. This was a relay race and there was so much excitement that I did not think any of the instructors including the Director saw what had just happened. I shook it off and got right back up, got my team together & kept marching. We still won :)

My head kept going around in a million circles and questioned whether I should tell any of the instructors/director. My classmates saw what happened and I was hurting physically and emotionally. It took everything for me to stay quiet as I had the most incredible faith that somehow someone saw what happened & this bully would just not move on to the next phase. We would get a phone call that evening notifying us whether we should show up to class the next day for the beginning of the next phase.

I got a wonderful voicemail last Thursday evening congratulating me for making into the next phase. I was so happy and just remembered all my accomplishments in life. If for some reason the bully made it into the next phase, I would approach the situation as I have with all the other challenges in my life: Determination, Patience, Resilience & never ending FAITH!

Friday morning, I walked into class and felt a weight lifted off my shoulders when I realized that the bully and his friend who had shoved me were not there...They had been dismissed! From over 300 applicants, 44 students were chosen for the first vestibule phase and now we are down to 27 students!

It is very unfortunate that bullying occurs at any point in our lives whether it is in school or at work. However, I believe the experience can teach us very valuable lessons about ourselves. There were so many times that I wanted to NOT come back from lunch, where I was hanging by a thread and still hung on and just did not give up hope ever!

I am so very thankful to all the great support and advice I received. Every person has a way of handling these types of situation. Patience, Resilience, Confidence & Faith are always my way and definitely not being afraid to open up and seek help!

I truly believe that these "Bullies" can be used as a metaphor in our everyday lives to never give up hope/faith and always try to keep pressing forward no matter what!

Much Love,

Patricia
Patty Boom Boom
www.patriciaalcivar.com
"Face Your Fears, Live Your Dreams"

It's Never Too Late!

I have been involved in some sort of sports for as long as I can remember. It has always been part of my lifestyle and a wonderful outlet for me, but I always felt something was missing especially after leaving home at the age of 15.

Once I started competing in Martial Arts, Running & then Boxing, I was never fueled by anger. My motivation has always been and always will be to be the best that I can be and prove to myself that I am worthy and can accomplish my goals. However, growing up I did hold on to anger especially towards my mom and was not spiritual. Although it never showed externally, I felt bitter about my childhood and had so many questions and feelings of insecurity.

Throughout the years, I struggled as I felt that being bitter was something toxic that would eventually eat me up slowly inside and I did not want to live like that. True forgiveness is something that is done with your body, mind and spirit, and it's not easy. One of the things I constantly talk about is faith and it is definitely one of the things that has helped me in my journey along with years of counseling and self awareness.

It is so hard to forgive because you might think you're "letting the other person off the hook" by forgiving them. Forgiving is for you, not the other person. Forgiveness allows you to return to love, to the good person you truly are and simply a matter of letting go of anger and resentment, and taking responsibility for your own emotional and physical situation. When you refuse to forgive, you might feel like you're punishing the other person, when in fact you're only punishing yourself.

So, this is part of what I was missing & slowly, but surely have found that peace within myself. I am now closer to my mom than I ever was and amazingly it has made me a better and stronger person and athlete! Earlier this year, I watched my 65-year old mom participate in her first 5k which was incredible! I speak with my mom on a daily basis & feel blessed to have the support I never had before. It really is NEVER too Late! I now fight, run and compete with even more purpose than before and for that, I am so very thankful.

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." Gandhi

Much Love,

Patty Boom Boom
www.patriciaalcivar.com